Let’s see … where was I?
Last you heard, I was still on Gemzar chemo. Since then I have moved to another one, called Topotecan, because when the previous chemo had stopped doing its job, I had to fire it. (My tumor marker shot up this Fall, and kept shooting up.)
I’ve had 3 infusions of the Topo nectar now and will get a tumor-marker test this week to see whether it’s working.
Thankfully I know my body is *not* "me," so I am still happy … and hope you are too.
Know that there can be various difficulties with you body that with training won't damage your state of mind. It's true!
At the end of December I was in limbo, waiting to see if I could get on a promising clinical trial (which didn’t open more slots) and then another one (which seemed to dissolve, leaving no trace). Until I can find a good trial, I am back on chemo.
On this new Topo regime, I’ve had more side effects, which took me several days to adjust to and figure out.
Acceptance is a big part of my practice. There’s a lot I’d like to write about that, but for now I will simply say it creates a space to understand where I am, and then the room to move forward.
Now I feel like I am back on my board, surfing those swells, rather than being pounded by them.
Here's a slice of my life about medications:
In ordinary terms it’s a lot easier because I now have routines for them. Yet they still take up a surprising amount of time, on top of my existing routines: For example, I have many pills, which have different dosages, to take at different times of day, with and without meals or whenever. I have 7 different-colored pill containers (holding pills of different colors, with white being especially popular), some pill boxes by the bed, some by the kitchen; the newer ones with notes attached about what they are and how to take them. It helps me to see when the box (a day of the week) within the (pill)box is empty, to confirm I've already taken that dose. That’s not including the “take as needed” prescriptions.
I think I could teach a medicine-management workshop.
Does that all make me a juggler? Not that anyone would want to watch. Hopefully another ball won't be thrown in for a little while, while I finish mastering the current routine.
I think that's everything for now. I will do my best to provide more frequent health updates, because people keep asking for them